The other part of orphan care

Through our process of adoption, I've learned so much about the needs of orphans in the world. To sum it up, most children who are orphaned are not able to be adopted. Therefore, adoption alone is not going to address the needs of these children. Yes, we are adopting, but our journey to meet the needs of orphans will continue beyond our adoption to orphan prevention. See the article below:

http://www.live58.org/the-critical-part-of-orphan-care-that-adoption-culture-has-totally-missed

Update on the O haus

In July, the O Haus moved down to Orlando, Florida. It was not the easiest transition, but we knew that God was in the midst of our circumstances. We are now 8 months into our time here, and the winds have shifted. While it was chaotic and emotional in the beginning, we now feel like we are getting settled and God is providing us with a community and more peace. We are even in the process of buying a house!!!

Evan
One of the main reasons that we moved from Virginia was for Evan. He finished up a Master's degree from Virginia Tech in Instructional Design, and in January of last year he began his search for something in this industry. Lo and behold, Orlando is a major hub for the type of work Evan does. He is working for a government contractor designing instruction for Naval battleships. He is thoroughly enjoying his job, loving the change of pace, and the creative challenges of his job.

Jackie
I have returned to teaching 5th grade. The school where I teach is nestled in a community and has some of the hardest working and supportive teachers I have ever encountered. It's been a tough adjustment from teaching in Virginia with all the differences in standards and testing. I regularly struggle with balancing motherhood and working and if this the career for me long term. However, I am trusting that God is using me where I am right now and so I will keep trucking.

Liv
Liv is an adorable package of joy and energy. She is walking, running, climbing, chattering, and bringing smiles to everyone around her. We regularly hear, "She is so happy!" She has been smiling since 6 weeks and pretty much hasn't stopped since.

Enzo
Enzo is adjusting to the role as big brother. He is enjoying Liv's new found ability to throw the ball for him.

Adoption
Since we have been in the process of adoption (July 2012), the wait time has increased 3 times. We are now in the midst of a 36-48 month wait from DTE (the date went sent our Dossier to Ethiopia- March 1, 2013). As of right now that means the soonest we would receive a referral is March 1, 2016 and the latest is March 1, 2017. HOWEVER, wait times are showing a trend of increasing so the wait time is likely longer. It's been hard to continue waiting. It seems like the pregnancy that will not end sometimes. We are trying to find the balance of expectancy while still living in the present. We will be working on some fundraisers in the near future to keep up with the financial demands.

In the wait

I received an email from our family coordinator recently just wanting to check in and confirm the details of our request. I answered all of the same questions as I have before (male or female, possibility of siblings, between 0-24 months). I told her about Liv, and how she brings us such joy,  smiles constantly, and overall is a very laid back girl.

Then, she asked a simple question, "How are you doing in the wait?" Well, I started to respond, and realized that the flood gates opened. I have so many more doubts, fears, and questions than I did when we started in 2012. I don't see this as a bad thing though. I think that this is a necessary process to go through instead of blindly walking through this.

I asked a lot of questions about why the wait is so long, why I don't hear anything about our specific case, and what comes of the orphans that are in orphanages right now. My family coordinator had some great insights, and I've included some of her thoughts below.

Basically, there’s lots of families and lots of children. I can ensure you this is very frustrating for me being in Ethiopia and seeing children who need families and knowing there are families waiting. However, it is mostly the government of Ethiopia causing this delay. We used to have very quick wait times years ago, but now the government is taking very long to sign off on documentation for a child to be cleared for adoption. We certainly support ethical adoptions and examining paperwork. But there’s lots of unnecessary holds. There has been negative adoption news coverage in Ethiopia, as well (one being the Hannah Williams story about an American couple who punished a child to the point of death). We are working to get more positive stories out to the Ethiopia government. But the reality is, there is  A LOT of documentation needed for each child’s adoption and everything takes much longer here. And sometimes, one level of the government doesn’t sign off on a document sitting on their desk for a while. And that document may be a preerequisite for another document. We have had a child sit in our Transition Home for a year before because of paperwork issues.

 

Here is some more information that may help, as well:

 

Included here are links to a couple of blog posts written by our CEO about ethical practices in adoption, especially pertaining to America World.

Ethics in Ethiopia (May, 2013)

Striving for Integrity

 

Integrity in Ethiopia

 

Below talks about how we get referrals and operate in country:

America World partners with several orphanages in Ethiopia.  Before we choose to partner with an orphanage, it goes through a screening process.  America World holds our partners to high standards and will break a partnership should there be any sign of unethical activity occurring.  Many of our orphanages do not strictly work with AWAA, but instead partner with other agencies and organizations, as well. 

 

America World also does their own investigation in each case before making a referral match.  We have specific staff that go to the field and investigate each child’s case.  In a relinquishment case, the staff member goes to the living family member and asks questions such as:

·         “Why did you give this child up for adoption?”

·         “How old do you believe this child to be?”

·         “How did you hear about adoption? Were you coerced into this decision?  Do you still want to give this child up for adoption?”

·         “Do you understand that once court is complete this is permanent?”

 

If it is an abandonment case, our staff goes to the locality of abandonment and interviews the local police and others in that area.  Our staff ensures this information is consistent with the information in the profile and that the case has no red flags.  If there are red flags, we further investigate.

Here is a note from Ryan Hanlon, the Executive Director of Programs:

Response to Book on International Adoption

At America World Adoption, we generally use our blog as a means of updating families on news and updates about adoption programs, training opportunities or other resources. Today, however, I want to use this forum to address some of the misinformation we’ve heard recently about Christian adoption agencies and the movement over the last decade in which Christians around the country have responded to God’s call on their lives to provide a family for parentless children.

A recent book calls into question the commitment, practices and motivations of reputable Christian agencies and the commitment and motivation of Christian adoptive families. This book, which I will not name, and the author have exaggerated facts, and misquoted and quoted out of context Christian adoption professionals.

As a licensed, accredited adoption agency, America World Adoption maintains the highest standards of service throughout our work. America World Adoption is proud of our work in Ethiopia and other countries and have been recognized by the U.S. Consulate in Ethiopia, the Department of State’s Office of Children’s Issues as well as the Ethiopian government for our strong efforts to ensure our work in Ethiopia is ethical, transparent and prioritizes children’s best interests.

International adoption is not the only thing we do in Ethiopia. In fact, we serve hundreds more families and children in Ethiopia every year that are not part of our adoption services. Our agency offers (free of charge) domestic adoption services to Ethiopian families interested in adopting a child. We are proud that we (with the support of our donors and adoptive families) are able to work with the Ethiopian government to provide financial assistance to vulnerable families so that we can prevent their family from breaking apart. In addition, we support nutrition projects, child education sponsorships and many other important projects. In total, we spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to support vulnerable families and communities in Ethiopia that is not part of the adoption processes for the families we serve.

In the book I’m referring to, the author asserts that evangelical adoption agencies are trafficking children and willfully separating families at any cost for the sake of finding children for adoptive families. Unfortunately, we all know that many children and families are exploited in this world. However, I don’t think it’s fair to say that evangelical adoption agencies are fueling this problem. It may be true that some agencies have had poor practices or even blindly allowed poor practices to be part of their adoption services – but that is not characteristic of Ethiopian adoption or international adoption in general. We at America World Adoption find unethical and disreputable practices to be reprehensible. 
It’s commendable that the author of the book attempts to raise awareness for unethical practices in international adoption; however, there should be recognition that these practices are not characteristic of international adoption as a whole. It’s inaccurate of her to broadly paint Christian agencies and Christian families as responsible for problems with international adoption. This book does not adequately recognize that many of the organizations that are at the forefront of combatting child trafficking, caring for the poor and supporting family services across the globe are Christian organizations. We thank God for organizations such as World Vision, International Justice Mission, Compassion International, hundreds of other groups and thousands of churches around the world.

There are tens of thousands of children around the world that desperately need families. At America World Adoption we continue to affirm our mission of building Christian families according to God’s plan of adoption. Our hope and prayer is a world where every child can grow up knowing they’re loved by their family and loved by God.

 

Ryan Hanlon
Executive Director of Programs

Ethiopian Adoption Update

We began our journey with our Ethiopian adoption in the summer of 2012. We submitted our Dossier (adoption paperwork) to Ethiopia on March 1, 2013, and since then our wait time has increased to 30-36 months to referral from the March 1st date. So, we are looking at receiving a referral some time between September 2015-March 2016, and this is just the date of receiving the referral not bringing the child home- that is another about 4 months for that. Oye, waiting is tough.

However in November we got a gift to keep us busy. We welcomed our daughter to the world, and have enjoyed getting to know her and this thing called parenthood. I have been asked many times during my pregnancy and after our daughter arrived-  Are you still adopting? Our answer is -absolutely! You see, our story is different than some. We are not adopting because we are not able to have biological children. We are adopting because we believe a call on our lives is to care for orphans. We may have more biological children during this long wait for the adoption if the Lord wills, and we still plan to bring home one or two children from Ethiopia (depending on what or referral says). So doing the math, we may have nearly enough for a basketball team, as my dad likes to say. 

Do we have any update about our specific case? Nope. We know that our paper work is in Ethiopia, and based on our request for 1 or 2 children under the age of 2, we can assume our child is not yet born. This is pretty crazy seeing as there are over 4 million orphans in Ethiopia. The Ministry of Women and Children's Affairs in Ethiopia is working to reform the adoption process and protect children from being trafficked. In every adoption case, there is a check to see if there are any living family members to care for the child. This is the country's and our first choice- stay with your relatives and in your country and culture if at all possible. We believe leaving your country is a last resort, but we believe we are a better alternative than an orphanage. In addition, our agency does a private investigation to insure all paperwork is authentic.

How can you help? Prayer.  Please pray for the people of Ethiopia and orphans around the world. We want to see families restored, and in the very least, more domestic adoptions and foster programs so children can stay in their country in their culture and not in orphanages. We have found a great organization called Bring Love In (http://bringlove.in/). They work to provide homes for orphans in Ethiopia with widows to care for them. 

We still feel blessed by and sure of this calling to adopt regardless of how long it will take. Thank you for your continued love and support for us in this journey. 

A long hiatus and now introducing.......

Meet my adorable 2 month old!

Greetings!  It has been so long since I've posted. Not to make any excuses, but I will- I've had a little one to care for! Our little love bug, Liv, was born on November 20th- one day after my due date. How's that for punctual? I know I'm a bit biased, but I think she's pretty stinkin' great. She's been eating and sleeping well by the grace of God!

Life has transformed to say the least. Priorities shifted. New rhythms. I'm actually currently typing this post one-handed while feeding her...and backwards...in high heels. Ok, but serious about the one-handed part.

I've enjoyed staying home with her during my 12 week leave, and I dread leaving her when I return to work, but so it goes. While on leave, I've enjoyed getting involved with a Bible study, BSF (https://www.bsfinternational.org/), and joined a MOPs group. I've met some wonderful ladies that I would not have met otherwise, and my life is richer for it!

News from the O haus

When Evan and I first went through premarital counseling, we were asked when we would want to start having kids. Evan and I both agreed that we would start thinking about it in 5 years. We  enjoyed it just being the two of us, and we have been able to go on some great adventures during the summer. Last summer, we celebrated 5 years of marriage and last year we began the process of adoption. I just realized this connection this week. God reminded me this week that His ways are unconventional but perfect.

Since Evan and I are in the midst of our 2-2.5 year wait time, we revisited the topic of having biological children during the wait, and well.....I'm pregnant. Since the wait is so long, having a biological child does not effect our adoption and we are still on track. The only change is our Ethiopia child(ren) will have a sibling to come home to. The due date is November 19th, and I'm enjoying the idea of "expecting" 2-3 kids (remind me of this when I feel like I'm going to lose my mind).

   

Ethics and adoption- a message from our agency

A recent blog post has gotten a lot of atttention about ethics and adoption. This is such an important topic, and one that any adoptive parent should be very aware of. I respect the way my agency approaches adoption and their response to inquiries about their ethics.

http://adoptedbydesign.typepad.com/blog/2013/05/on-ethical-adoptions.html

May 17, 2013

On Ethical Adoptions

There is a popular blog whose Christian author recently posted about ethics in adoption. The author is an adoptive parent who adopted internationally. I will not name the blog or author, but it was impressive to see how wide-ranging her impact was – our agency was inundated with emails shortly after this blog was posted. There is something to rejoice in here: It’s a truly wonderful thing to know that so many families are concerned about the ethics of international adoption. The blog didn’t mention our agency or address us, but since so many families wrote to us following the blog post we thought it would be helpful to respond.
First, there are a lot of things this blog post got right. The author was absolutely right in noting that adoption processes should not be about adoptive parents’ rights to a child. She is absolutely right to grieve over the abuses, coercions and broken families that have resulted from fraud, lies and corruption. And she is absolutely right to say that adoption should not be motivated by a desire to provide children with a wealthier family. Although there are points on this blog post that we certainly didn’t agree with and wouldn’t endorse, on these issues she is right, and ought to be commended.
At America World Adoption, we don’t believe our agency, our staff or the adoption systems we work in are perfect. We’re not naïve enough to believe that there are not children and families who have been very hurt by fraud, abuses or corruption. We know this has happened to some families and we grieve with you. If there are cases of adoption abuses, our agency stands with other adoption professionals asking for the abuses to be prosecuted. But we don’t want to paint a picture of international adoption as a system that is primarily composed of fraudulent cases. We don’t believe that. We also believe that most of the adoptive families we work with care first and foremost about children. We believe they deeply and compassionately care about those children’s birth families. We also believe that children living in orphanages should have an opportunity to grow up with parents: if birth parent reunification isn’t possible, kinship placements should be sought; if this isn’t possible, domestic adoption should be considered; when this isn’t a possibility, international adoption can be a great, appropriate and God-ordained way of ensuring that children grow up with families. Finally, we want to say, loud and clear, that we unapologetically don’t believe international adoption is a “last resort”. Abusive families, orphanages, foster care, group homes, or growing up as a street child are worse options for a child.
The topic of corruption and fraud in international adoption truly is helpful and hopefully will result in more informed and prepared parents. We hope and pray that this “trendy topic” leads to true changes and doesn’t result in fewer children growing up with parents. It’s possible to continue to improve our imperfect systems and continue to serve children and families at the same time. That’s our commitment and we hope if you have feedback on this subject for how we can do this better that you’ll share it with us.
-Brian Luwis, founder and CEO