Settling into the unknown

Recently, a friend of mine recommended that I read Sue Monk Kidd's When the Heart Waits. Kidd's writing is beautifully descriptive as she shares about a season in her life where she was called to wait. The biggest take away is that the only way out of the pain of waiting is settling deep into it. Sounds fun, right? Counter-intuitive?

The image present throughout the book is that of a caterpillar's metamorphosis. A caterpillar wraps itself in a cocoon and stays there until the change is complete. There is no rushing the stages of metamorphosis. "It's truly a fantastic mechanism developed by nature, yet while all may seem fantastic on the outside, this transformation looks pretty gruesome deep inside the chrysalis. In short, for a caterpillar to turn into a butterfly it digests itself using enzymes triggered by hormones, before sleeping cells similar to stem cells grow into the body parts of the future butterfly." (ZME Science). In other words, in order to feel the greatest change, we have to enter into the painful and long process of digesting our old self and turning into something new. 

Several months ago I began counseling. I consider myself a well-adjusted person, but over the past two and a half years I've experienced a good amount of loss in different forms. I am no longer teaching - a profession that I am deeply passionate about and felt great success and satisfaction. My husband and I have struggled with infertility - a journey filled with disappointment and loss of a life we thought we'd have. Then there is the adoption - the wait that seems to never end and the ache that won't go away. I found that I was crumbling under the weight of these struggles. I would be able to handle the pain for a period of time, perhaps through telling myself the trite pieces of conventional wisdom that we have all heard - "It will all work out," "It is for the best," "At least you have ___," "Everything happens for a reason." Or times when I was feeling more spiritual I may have been able to cling to God' promises of His goodness. The only thing is, these little nuggets of wisdom weren't helping. They simply weren't permeating my heart. Aside - If you have a friend or family member experiencing some kind of long trial, advice on how to get out of the pain or "band-aid" comments like those above aren't helpful. Just say, "I'm sorry you are in pain. How can I support you during this time?"

My counselor explained to me that all people have a reaction to pain or trauma - 5 F's: fight, flight, freeze, fidget, and faint. She discerningly deduced that I faint. When faced with pain or trauma, I deal with it as long as I can and then I check out or metaphorically faint. She explained that we have to pave a new path in my mind, a path into the pain. She has helped me find my way into the depths of the pain (which goes waaaaayyyyyy deeper than we think), and coached me on how to stay in it. You know what's strange? I began learning how to support myself in the pain and I have begun to feel a positive change. I am not crumbling like I was before. Don't get me wrong, I cry, but I can stay in the place of pain without fear or avoidance.

I am not sure how long I will be wrapped up in a cocoon and when I will emerge. But, I am now confident of this - I will emerge different, better, and with  wings.

"I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living! Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!" Psalm 27:13-14.

Update on the O haus

In July, the O Haus moved down to Orlando, Florida. It was not the easiest transition, but we knew that God was in the midst of our circumstances. We are now 8 months into our time here, and the winds have shifted. While it was chaotic and emotional in the beginning, we now feel like we are getting settled and God is providing us with a community and more peace. We are even in the process of buying a house!!!

Evan
One of the main reasons that we moved from Virginia was for Evan. He finished up a Master's degree from Virginia Tech in Instructional Design, and in January of last year he began his search for something in this industry. Lo and behold, Orlando is a major hub for the type of work Evan does. He is working for a government contractor designing instruction for Naval battleships. He is thoroughly enjoying his job, loving the change of pace, and the creative challenges of his job.

Jackie
I have returned to teaching 5th grade. The school where I teach is nestled in a community and has some of the hardest working and supportive teachers I have ever encountered. It's been a tough adjustment from teaching in Virginia with all the differences in standards and testing. I regularly struggle with balancing motherhood and working and if this the career for me long term. However, I am trusting that God is using me where I am right now and so I will keep trucking.

Liv
Liv is an adorable package of joy and energy. She is walking, running, climbing, chattering, and bringing smiles to everyone around her. We regularly hear, "She is so happy!" She has been smiling since 6 weeks and pretty much hasn't stopped since.

Enzo
Enzo is adjusting to the role as big brother. He is enjoying Liv's new found ability to throw the ball for him.

Adoption
Since we have been in the process of adoption (July 2012), the wait time has increased 3 times. We are now in the midst of a 36-48 month wait from DTE (the date went sent our Dossier to Ethiopia- March 1, 2013). As of right now that means the soonest we would receive a referral is March 1, 2016 and the latest is March 1, 2017. HOWEVER, wait times are showing a trend of increasing so the wait time is likely longer. It's been hard to continue waiting. It seems like the pregnancy that will not end sometimes. We are trying to find the balance of expectancy while still living in the present. We will be working on some fundraisers in the near future to keep up with the financial demands.

Ethiopian Adoption Update

We began our journey with our Ethiopian adoption in the summer of 2012. We submitted our Dossier (adoption paperwork) to Ethiopia on March 1, 2013, and since then our wait time has increased to 30-36 months to referral from the March 1st date. So, we are looking at receiving a referral some time between September 2015-March 2016, and this is just the date of receiving the referral not bringing the child home- that is another about 4 months for that. Oye, waiting is tough.

However in November we got a gift to keep us busy. We welcomed our daughter to the world, and have enjoyed getting to know her and this thing called parenthood. I have been asked many times during my pregnancy and after our daughter arrived-  Are you still adopting? Our answer is -absolutely! You see, our story is different than some. We are not adopting because we are not able to have biological children. We are adopting because we believe a call on our lives is to care for orphans. We may have more biological children during this long wait for the adoption if the Lord wills, and we still plan to bring home one or two children from Ethiopia (depending on what or referral says). So doing the math, we may have nearly enough for a basketball team, as my dad likes to say. 

Do we have any update about our specific case? Nope. We know that our paper work is in Ethiopia, and based on our request for 1 or 2 children under the age of 2, we can assume our child is not yet born. This is pretty crazy seeing as there are over 4 million orphans in Ethiopia. The Ministry of Women and Children's Affairs in Ethiopia is working to reform the adoption process and protect children from being trafficked. In every adoption case, there is a check to see if there are any living family members to care for the child. This is the country's and our first choice- stay with your relatives and in your country and culture if at all possible. We believe leaving your country is a last resort, but we believe we are a better alternative than an orphanage. In addition, our agency does a private investigation to insure all paperwork is authentic.

How can you help? Prayer.  Please pray for the people of Ethiopia and orphans around the world. We want to see families restored, and in the very least, more domestic adoptions and foster programs so children can stay in their country in their culture and not in orphanages. We have found a great organization called Bring Love In (http://bringlove.in/). They work to provide homes for orphans in Ethiopia with widows to care for them. 

We still feel blessed by and sure of this calling to adopt regardless of how long it will take. Thank you for your continued love and support for us in this journey. 

News from the O haus

When Evan and I first went through premarital counseling, we were asked when we would want to start having kids. Evan and I both agreed that we would start thinking about it in 5 years. We  enjoyed it just being the two of us, and we have been able to go on some great adventures during the summer. Last summer, we celebrated 5 years of marriage and last year we began the process of adoption. I just realized this connection this week. God reminded me this week that His ways are unconventional but perfect.

Since Evan and I are in the midst of our 2-2.5 year wait time, we revisited the topic of having biological children during the wait, and well.....I'm pregnant. Since the wait is so long, having a biological child does not effect our adoption and we are still on track. The only change is our Ethiopia child(ren) will have a sibling to come home to. The due date is November 19th, and I'm enjoying the idea of "expecting" 2-3 kids (remind me of this when I feel like I'm going to lose my mind).

   

Yard Sale!

Come one, come all to the Oster Family Adoption Fundraiser. It will be at our place in Oak Tree on Saturday, May 4th starting bright and early. Also, let me know if you have anything you'd be willing to dontate!

Beautiful message from Unveiled faces

I was reading through the blogs I follow, and I came upon an entry from an amazing family. An amazing adoptive family. An amazing transracial family....with 7 kids. The blogger puts a refreshing perspective on trials and racism and reminds us what our God endured. See the post below.

http://ourunveiledfaces.blogspot.com/2013/04/and-yet-so-far-to-go-on-racism-and-jesus.html

And Yet So Far to Go: on Racism and Jesus

You are all sons of God, through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptized in Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise.

Galatians 3:26-29

Our family is filled with color

by irreversible choice. in love. through adoption.

There was a time in our country when a family like ours would not have been received with enthusiasm.

God, in His sovereignty, with the sacrifices of generations of bold saints who have gone before us, changed all that.

What He did not change is the inclination of human hearts to remain ignorant of the GRACE that HE poured out on the cross available

to every person

of every color

of every nation

who are image bearers of HIMSELF.

To be ignorant is to ignore the revealed TRUTH of JESUS.

God does not excuse ignorance.

ever.

In a world of highly evolved social conscience, we might be led to believe that racism is something that was put to rest.

I can testify that is NOT the case.

As the one who has absorbed all the trauma that my children have been through, this trauma is one that my love and perseverance can heal through His power, but cannot erase.

Even though it was absorbed by our LORD JESUS on the cross at Calvary, the sting of hatred and prejudice continues to rule in the hearts of the ignorant.

And it is NOT tolerated or ignored by Him.

It will not be tolerated or ignored by our family, either.
Because racism is not like any other sin against our Holy God.
As each soul He creates bears His image,
racism is HATING the very image of God.

"If we believe in the sovereign grace of God, the redemptive restoration of God-- then we are never afraid of the Truth.

And maybe our deafening silence is just this:

Truth necessitates confrontation-- and a whole lot of us are more chicken than Christian. We'd rather save our own skin, than the skin of the bruised and battered and beaten.

We're more in love with self-preservation than with Savior glorification.

We'd rather make pain invisible than say injustice is intolerable--

so the injustice continues." Ann Voscamp, A Holy Experience

It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit, through whom also He went and preached to the spirits in prison...1 Peter 3:17-19

So this message is to those in prison.

Either the prison of hatred

or the prison of cowardice.

While Jesus' body lay in the tomb, His Spirit was working.

Jesus was into confrontation.

No evil deed remains covered in the light of His LOVE.

He came to set the captives free in more ways than we- or the evil one can even imagine.

That same ugly spirit that God knew would cause Jesus to suffer and die,

is the same ugly spirit that causes hatred through racism to remain alive today.

Why did they hate Him so?

Why did they want Him out of the way?

Knowing the answer to this, I asked my son the same question.
Why did they hate HIM so?
Was it because He was different?
My son's answer---
"It was because He was better."

God isn't looking for players who "have the guts to fight back."

He is looking for players who "have the guts not to fight back."

Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit, says the LORD Almighty. Zechariah 4:6

Because in the end......He wants none of us to perish-- But gives everyone an equal playing field to be part of His --

irreversible choice, in love, through adoption.

Not to choose, is to choose.

There is no middle lane on the narrow road.

Ethics and adoption

We have been so blessed in working with our agency, America World. I know, though, when going through the adoption process it is easy to get impatient. I found this article by blogger, Addison Cooper, to be very helpful when thinking about adoption. There are also great resources out there for "interviewing" your future agency. I found great questions in a yahoo group file. The interview helped Evan and I decided on AWAA. Our now family coordinator patiently answered 2 hours worth of questions, and she is amazing about returning phone calls and emails promptly (a must in my book!) Here is Addidion's blog post:

Twelve Things You Can Do to Make Sure Your Adoption is Ethical

Watching Beasts of the Southern Wild started me thinking about ethics in adoption. I know I wrote some hard things yesterday. If you're on this site, you probably want to have an ethical, kid-centered, health-building adoption. I want to be a part of making that happen.

Here are some of my gleanings from the online adoption community, and from my own practice as an adoption social worker - twelve things that you can do to make sure your adoption is an ethical one.

Here are twelve ways to make sure your adoption is an ethical one:

flickr.com / Tsahi Levent-Levi

Ask Questions

1. Ask your adoption agency how they find children who need to be adopted.

2. Ask what sort of counseling that they provide to the child’s first family. Is their counseling a balanced representation of all options geared at helping the person make the choice that’s best for them, or is it a one-sided “sales pitch”?

3. Ask whether they still extend full services to women who, after contact the agency, choose to parent their child – or, do they only provide services if the woman says she’ll relinquish, but only provide referrals if she decides to parent?

4. Ask how actively they pursue the involvement of the birth father. Do they seek his input and participation, or do they just do the legal minimum standard of notification and assure you that he “probably won’t show up.”?

5. Ask how thoroughly they train and assess adoptive parents.

6. Ask how they feel about openness. Do they speak of it as a wonderful commitment, or as something that adoptive parents can agree to, but then quickly change their minds on, once an adoption is finalized?

Do Your Research

7. Research the adoption practices in the country you’re considering adopting from.

8. Research your agency – if they’re “for profit” their motivation might more easily be on the side of pleasing the adopting parent (and although that sounds good, it increases the risk of unethical treatment of the birth parents.)

9. Speaking of that term, "birth parent" – does the agency use the post-adoption term “birth parents” for women who are still pregnant? That might communicate an expectation which makes it difficult for pregnant women and expectant fathers to feel like they have the freedom to make whichever choice they see as best.

10. If your agency is non-profit, check out their profile on Guidestar.org and see where they get their funds from and what they do with them. If they’re for-profit, try to figure out how they avoid being driven by profits rather than by people’s real needs. Friends of mine who were considering adoption once told me of a for-profit agency that would have charged them around $25,000 up front, and which expressed a commitment to encouraging pregnant women to choose adoption once they’d expressed an interest in it. My friends ended up adopting through a different agency. They expressed that it “felt like the agency was more on the birth mother’s side than ours,” but that they were comfortable with that balance. It seemed healthier that way.

11. Visit your agency’s website, and read the pages for adopting parents and for expectant parents. See if the message is consistent, or if they seem to say different things to different people.

12. Check out the Internet adoption community. There's lots of insight from all sides of the adoption community. Some excellent articles have been Shannon LC Cate's “Ten Red Flags That Your Adoption Agency Might Be Coercive," Creating a Family's "Red Flags for Unethical Adoption Agencies" and adoptionbirthmothers.com's post, "Is Your Adoption Agency Ethical?"

These are some hard questions - but if you work through them now, you'll be able to proudly share your adoption story with your child. Adoptive parents, birth parents, social workers, adoptees --- I'd love your input. Which questions belong on this list? Which don't really matter? Which should be added?


Find this site helpful? Check out Adoption at the Movies on Facebook.

A day long awaited...

Evan called me today and said, "Guess what arrived?" I knew. The I-171H. Thank you so much to my prayer warriors for your faithful prayers that the letter would come this week. It has arrived at last!

The letter is so formal. It comes from the Department of Homeland Security, and it grants us permission to adopt an orphan and bring he/she into the United States. Even in its formality, I was still moved to tears, "It has been determined that you are able to furnish proper care to an orphan(s)..."

Since I got home from work, we have been feverishly working to check and double check our Dossier documents so that we can head to Fed Ex for it to head to our agency, America World, first thing tomorrow. Thank you to my amazing friend, Stacie, who has notarized countless documents for us and put up with me blubbering as she notarized the last document today.

Our child is one step closer. In just 3 weeks all of the work of 6.5 months will arrive in Ethiopia and will lead us to our child (or children). Please join us in prayer for the paper work to be processed smoothly, for the Dossier to arrive in Ethiopia and be processed efficiently, and most importantly for our child (children) that this stack of paper will lead us to.

Oh, I-171H, how you ail me

Evan and I have been waiting for a letter from the USCIS for our federal fingerprinting appointment that will result in the last piece of paperwork necessary for the Dossier- the I-171H. This piece of paperwork is often referred to as the "golden ticket" because it grants permission from the U.S. government for you to bring in a person from another country into the U.S.

I did receive a packet in the mail yesterday from the USCIS office, but it was a rejection notice. Thourghout the process, we have been sure to cross every "t" and dot every "i" and the one piece of paperwork that you wouldn't want to make an error on is this one because it takes so long to get the I-171H from the federal government. Well, we forgot to sign the application. I know there has to be a greater purpose in this because this kind of oversight is not like us at all.

When I called the USCIS office, I made sure that we have everything needed to resubmit and Evan zipped to FedEx and overnighted our corrected packet to the USCIS office in Texas. While I was on the phone with the lady from USCIS, she said the timeframe we are looking at to get the I-171H is 75 days! This is way longer than it has been. If this is truly the case, we won't be able to submit our Dossier until March or April. On the heels of the news that the wait time has increased, this is a tough pill to swallow.

I still hold to the fact that all of this is in God's plan, and His timing is perfect. However, the waiting is so hard. Please pray for things to move faster or for God is bless us with peace with a longer wait time.

An update- where are we now?

Well it's been a while. So, let me give you a bit of an update. We have finalized our Home Study, and we had it written that we are requesting one child 0-2 years either boy or girl. However, we had it also written in the Home Study that were are approved for 2 children 0-2 years. What is the difference? If there comes an opportunity and a need for a home for two children under two, we are approved to take them, but at this point it is not our formal request.

Since we received our final Home Study, we mailed off one copy to USCIS to get our federal fingerprints. These result in the last piece of paper work that needs to go in our Dossier. Although that sounds simple enough, getting the fingerprinting appointment and resulting clearance letter from the Federal government can take 2 months. SO, please pray that it goes faster!

We also found out to day that the murmurings of a longer wait time, is confirmed. Rather than the original projection of 18-24 months wait time (after Dossier submission), we are looking at 24-30 months. Even though I knew it was coming, why do I still feel so down? It's difficult staying encouraged during this time.

What I do know however, is that we have raised enough funds to cover Dossier submission and program fees. We will amp up the fundraising efforts again as it nears our travel time......2 and a half years from now. Thank you all for your continued prayer and support.

iPad give away!

We have very generously been given a brand new (receipt in hand) 3rd generation 16 GB white iPad, and we are using this blessing to do a give away!

How it works:

You get entered once for every $20 donation. So, if you give $100, you are entered five times!!!

You can donate online through our Eternal Family Program with our agency, America World. Donate to our adoption costs here. Choose "Eternal Family Program" from the drop down menu and in the notes section, please make sure you write our names (otherwise the donations will not go to us and I won't know you entered). If you'd feel more comfortable mailing a check, please email me for our address.

You can also donate and be entered at our Silent Auction on November  10th 12:00-3:00 pm at 130 Jackson Street in Blacksburg.

Another way to be entered is you can "share" this announcement on Facebook or Twitter. Email if you have shared, and I will put your name in!

We will announce the winner on Black Friday- November, 23rd. I will mail or meet up with the winner to give the give away!!!

Generosity

We are just blown away. God is continuing to be so faithful. We have had several large donations recently towards our adoption, and it is ever reminding us of how huge God is and how this $38,000 is truly his bill.

A friend of ours is also adopting, and a fundraiser that worked very well for her was an ipad giveaway......a donated ipad. So, Evan threw the opportunity out there on facebook on Saturday morning. He mentioned that if you've been looking for a way to give, would you consider donating an ipad. Within 24 hours, the ipad is in hand.

I am humbled by people's generosity, by God's sovereign plan through all of this, and that He wants us to bring this child home even more than we do. I feel so blessed to be interacting with God through this experience. It reminds me that when we step out in faith and allow God to have the driver seat, the story is so much better than anything we can write.

Attatchment 101

I follow many fantastic blogs, and one is called The Wayman Family Nest. This family also adopted from Ethiopia, and this post discussing attachment and the ever important "cocooning."

Attachment 101 http://thewaymanfamilynest.blogspot.com/2012/10/attachment-101.html

A couple of days ago I mentioned I'd be doing about how Hayes has been doing as far as attachment goes, so here we go...

Hayes was 6 1/2 months old when we brought him home. He had lived in 2 different orphanages during his young life. He was passed around among many caregivers. He had no real attachment to anyone. When we brought him back to the guest house where we were staying, the other families kept exclaiming what a "good" baby he was. I knew that this was not normal (and not that he wasn't a "good" baby, but it's not normal for a baby to NEVER cry. On the flip side, he didn't smile or make cooing noises much either.). He was just as content to be held by random strangers in Ethiopia (and they WILL just take your baby from you! haha!) as he was to be held by us. Hayes did not trust that any one specific person would be there to meet his needs. So from the time we arrived home, we began "cocooning."

For 2 weeks Hayes and I didn't leave the house. Most families actually cocoon much longer, but I was going stir crazy! The hubby and I were the only ones to hold, feed, rock, bathe, change, and comfort him. When he did cry, we immediately met his needs (usually with a bottle and cuddle time). After 2 weeks we ventured out a bit, usually just to Target so mommy could get out of the house. A couple of times (even after being home for a month) we went to a restaurant and it was just too much for him. After these instances we would stay at home for a few days. We didn't usually get out but once every 3-4 days. After 2 weeks we also let immediate family hold him. Honestly, I was planning on waiting longer, but I didn't feel that people really understood (and I felt like they were upset with us), so I bulked under the pressure. After we had been home for about a month, we went to church. Even there we didn't allow anyone to hold him (which is what we did when we went anywhere was there were more than just a few people present).

For us it was a beautiful time of bonding. It is such a crucial time to Hayes's healing process. We have seen a huge difference in our son. He now cries and lets us know when he has a need. He smiles and laughs and is an all-around happy, confident little guy. He loves to be cuddled and he loves touch-holding hands, putting his hands on our faces, etc. He will let other people hold him, but still looks for mommy and sometimes wants to come back to me. When he fusses when someone else is holding him, we still are the ones to comfort him. He knows that we are mommy and daddy. The difference in him is truly amazing.

And still after 4 months at home, we've been the only ones to feed, bathe, change, and rock him to sleep. We also have only left him in the nursery on 2 occasions and once with a family member (for 1 hour). This is about to DRASTICALLY change as I go back to work a week from today. To say that I'm nervous is an understatement, but more on that later as this post is getting lengthy! We'll continue to watch Hayes, as attachment is an ongoing process. I've already told the hubby that if we see him regress in the area of attachment, then I'm quitting! And I mean it! I'm not going to work the detriment of our bond with Hayes. We would love to have your prayers during this time of transition for our family.

Here are some things I wished we had done a little differently that maybe can help some of you in the process:
- Prepare friends and family for what cocooning will look like ahead of time.
- Cocoon as long as you feel is necessary.
- Stick to the rules that you established as far as the time frame for others to hold him.
- Wear younger children in a wrap/ergo. I didn't do this (I usually just held him on the couch or rocked him), but I think he would have benefitted from this.

For more info on cocooning and attachment, read here, here or here.

Sorry for the LONG post, but hopefully some of you who have just arrived home with your children or who will soon be home with your children will benefit from this in some way.

Here are some pictures of what attachment looked like early on in our house...

Snuggles with mommy.

DId you see? Have you heard?

Did you notice the fundraising thermometer? We broke $10,000! God has been so faithful in continuung to provide, and we are believing Him for the full amount. Before we can submit our Dossier, we need to raise another $3,000-4,000. Will you join us in praying for this?

Girl OR a boy!

Evan and I have made the decision to request either a girl or a boy age 0-24 months. We feel like God is leading us to be open. In addition, how sweet will that moment be when we receive our referral and it's a surprise as to what it will be! Join us in praying for our child:

God we ask for your blessing. We pray that you grown in our child. 

Please keep him or her safe and filled with love. 

Give us grace daily to be loving and spirit filled parents 

who will raise our child up knowing you. 

Amen

Sweet sacrifice

I love what I do. I teach enthusiastic 10 year-olds each day. I love that my day never looks the same as the last. Mostly, I adore that I can make an impact on a young person's life. Every once in a while, one of my former students stops by to pay me a visit. I'm always floored by how grown up they look!

At the beginning of the school day today, I had a sweet surprise. A younger sibling of a former student stopped by and handed me an envelope. Sydney heard that Evan and I are adopting from Ethiopia, and she and her sister decided to help. Riley, Sydney's younger sister, hands me an envelope and said, "We've been earning money for your adoption." They had a lemonade stand and saved all the funds for us. I hugged this sweet girl up and told her how much that meant to me. Later on, I opened the envelope and found this:

$28 in one dollar bills.  The generosity of the two young girls reminds me of the story of the widow's offering. 

Luke 21

New International Version (NIV)

The Widow’s Offering

21 As Jesus looked up, he saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury. ² He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins. ³ “Truly I tell you,” he said, “this poor widow has put in more than all the others. ⁴ All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”

Thank you Sydney and Riley for your faith!

Poker Night!

Our first fundraiser, the Texas Hold'em Tournament, went wonderfully! We were blessed by the genersoity of those who showed up and those who bought in even through they weren't able to make it! Thank you to Jimmy John's and Kroger for donating food, and a big thanks to Bull & Bones for donating the 1st and 3rd prizes. Evan did an amazing job coming up with this fantastic fundraiser and with organizing it. Congrats to Dwayne for winning the Gloss Boss Streetailing raffle for a free car detail!

Our 3rd place winner is Joe with a $40 gift card to Bull & Bones
Our 2nd place winner is Matt with a free car detail from the Gloss Boss
and........
Our 1st place winner is Tom with a $100 gift card to Bull & Bones

We raised $590!!! Congrats and thank you for all your support!!!

Having a tough time....

It's inevitable that there will be times of discouragement, and I am in one. There have been several sad events in the lives of those around us that have intensified my discouraged state.

We are currently in the paper chase. All of our paper work is in and we are simply waiting for the approval and a phone call from our social worker. I have trouble with this waiting, and I think my discouragement comes from knowing that the waiting I'm experiencing now is only the tip of the iceberg.

The reality of my wait time is sinking in - 18-24 months......once I submit the Dossier. However, it's looking like wait times are increasing and so 24 months to referral can be more like 30 months. Keep in mind that is not even to bring our child home; that is just to the referral. Add about 4 months from referral to bringing the child home.

I hate to be a real downer, but this space is here to share the ups and the downs. Please pray that God comforts and encourages us during this time.

Chocolate hair, Vanilla Care

I love this blog. She has amazing tips about how to care for your child's hair. Check out this post:

5 Natural Hair Tips for New Parents

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If you are a new parent, via adoption or birth, and you're not sure what to do when it comes to hair, this post is for you. Not all children find their forever families at birth, so we not only address concerns that people might have with babies, but also the older children that come to us later in their young live...

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I need Africa more than it needs me...

Let me never forget this....